Category Archives: Culture

Things That Probably Don’t Need to be Said: Things That Need to be Said Edition

Culture, Politics & Culture

Prologue

None of this needs to be said – it’s just fun to say it! Proceed at your own risk, and don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Me at my overconfident best!

And now, on with the show!

I’ve been noticing that there are a lot of folks out there who suffer from the delusion that what they have to say NEEDS to be said. I first noticed this in the title of John Pavlovitz’s blog, stuff that needs to be said. While I found myself agreeing with Pavlovitz quite a bit (at least in general), that whole “needs to be said” thing seemed a little over-the-top, pushy, overconfident, pompous, or even – dare I say it – arrogant. I do approve of the lack of capital letters in the title though: it shows at least a degree of humility.

Another notable example is Frank Schaeffer, a former Christian fundamentalist and current “self-described Christian atheist” who has a blog/substack entitled It Has to Be Said. Once again, I found myself agreeing with a lot of what Schaeffer had to say, but once again (again), I found myself thinking that “It Has to Be Said” was kind of overselling it.

Don’t get me wrong, I have no doubt that these are smart guys (probably much smarter then me) and a lot of thought goes into what they have to say (waaaaay more, for example, than has gone into any of my own posts), but I wonder – does all this REALLY need to be said? I know that essentially nothing I have to say NEEDS to be said (if you don’t believe me, just ask the lovely and talented Jess), and in fact, the world would probably be a better, more pleasant place if I didn’t say most of the stuff I do say (ask anyone in my family).

Even the minimal amount of research I put into this turkey of a post (and honestly, “minimal” might be overstating it) fetched up a whole raft of books, videos, and websites full of things that people feel have to be said, and said by them. And I think that’s the key right there – saying it has to be said is the same as saying it has to be heard. Otherwise, it’s just screaming into the abyss. From what I can see by a quick scan of Google results, pretty much nobody with something that “has to be said” has anything that actually has to be said.

Once again, I fall back on that old “words have meaning” pet peeve of mine. I am under no illusions that anything I say “has to be said”, nor does it have to be heard. However, I will admit to feeling that frequently there are some things that I need to say, whether anyone hears them or not. Screaming into the abyss may not do anyone else any good, but it often really makes the screamer feel better.

I mean, when was the last time you read any kind of “has to be said” thing that changed your mind about anything, or really even made you think? If anything, in these days of customized information streams (“Let our algorithm choose what info is best for YOU!”), the chances are that if we actually come across anything that contradicts what we already think/believe, we’re just going to ignore it. If we think about it at all, it’s just as a marginal reassurance that our impending robot overlords have some glitches in their software that we can exploit when they take over.

Of course, sometimes you just get lucky and actually say something that didn’t need to be said that someone did need to hear.

I guess what really bothers me about this whole thing is the sense of self-importance that these writers/bloggers/content creators have. I know I would never dream of saying that anything I had to say “has to be said”. I know better and, if I’m being honest, humility has always been one of my most outstanding qualities.

On second thought, I guess sometimes I do have to say the things I do – I’m just sure that no one actually needs to hear any of it.

Except you. You know who you are.

Ridiculous Times: Stuff That Probably Doesn’t Need To Be Said – Superbowl Edition

All About Me, Culture, Politics, Politics & Culture, Religion

Just like in Spaceballs when they skip lightspeed to go to plaid, we’ve surpassed the old Chinese curse, “May you live in interesting times” to live in a ridiculous time. Frankly, it’s kind of embarrassing.

Take the Super Bowl (or Superb Owl, or Superbowel, depending on how you feel about it). I’ll admit that I was happy the Chiefs won: not that I care about the game, but I’ve honestly been enjoying all the Taylor Swift conspiracy theories. To be honest, I know nothing about Taylor Swift, other than that she’s very pretty, very popular, she died horribly in Amsterdam* and apparently, she is the most powerful force in American politics today. At any rate, the Chiefs’ victory ensured a brief continuation of what is, for me, the most ridiculous (and entertaining) of the current crop of conspiracy theories.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Taylor Swift – The most powerful woman in America

Watching the MAGAmaniacs (MAGAniacs?) carry on about how the Swift thing is a psyop**to help Biden win in November is pretty damned funny. I’m not even sure how someone would go about satirizing that. To be perfectly clear, I don’t know anybody who doesn’t think that whole thing is abominably stupid – and the vast majority of my friends are staunch conservatives. It’s not a conservative or Republican theory, it’s a bunch of nonsense promoted by televised right-wing talking heads, politicians, and professional shit-stirrers.

It’s also notable that over here on the left side of the field (well, left/center), that none of the televised left-wing talking heads, politicians, or political shit-stirrers are taking it seriously (which of course doesn’t stop them from going on about it in search of clicks and ratings***). But don’t get too excited – there’s plenty of other nonsense for them to get waaaay too excited about. The problem is, for me at least, that while many of the left-wing screaming points are almost as ridiculous, they’re just not that entertaining – or original (This just in: Great Googly-Moogly! Trump said something racist, sexist, incendiary, or indecipherable! What you NEED to know!). Good grief, it is Tuesday already? I kinda feel like my own side is letting me down.

I’ve also been enjoying all of the whining about how people resent all the screen time wasted showing Swift during the games: “I wanna watch football, not some lefty bimbo!” (I’m paraphrasing). I mean, I totally understand where they’re coming from: having to look at a pretty girl for anywhere from 30-60 seconds of non-playing time during a 4-hour-long broadcast must be horribly frustrating.

The lovely and talented Jess and I got rid of cable/satellite TV years ago, because we hate commercials. I know how frustrated I’d be if my streaming services started interrupting my movies periodically for something I’m in not interested in at all (lookin’ at YOU, Amazon!). However, I am having a little trouble understanding the whole objecting-to-looking-at-a-pretty-girl-because-of-her-politics thing, to be honest (not that I would ever objectify a woman – gotta maintain my liberal-left-wing-commie-pinko-fag card).

In other Super Bowl-related ridiculousness, how about that “Jesus Gets Us” commercial? Apparently, everyone hated it, for reasons with absolutely no overlap: I saw a video from a guy who was horrified by it, because it apparently Wokefies Jesus – obviously a lefty plot. Gasp! The horror! This dude is apparently horrified by the idea that Jesus loves everyone, and that we should too****.

I followed that up by reading an article about how horrible the ad is, because of the apparently shady organizations/motivations behind it (the Hobby Lobby folks among others), are using it as a bait-and-switch to lure LGBTQI+, women who might be thinking about an abortion, addicts, and other folks like that, who are desperate for acceptance in so they can be either “fixed” or crushed and discarded as irredeemable. Obviously a conservative plot!

Then there are the sort of Christians that I know and love – you know, the kind who genuinely try to love and care for everybody. They’re offended by the fact that a gazillion dollars that could have been spent taking care of people/helping people was spent on an ad. Okay, this one, I actually get.

Even when we don’t like something, we’re not happy unless everyone else hates it for the same reason we do. We are ridiculous people living in an increasingly ridiculous country. So we’ve got that going for us!

* For my money, one of the best movies of 2022* (ironically, her character in the film was the victim of a conspiracy – coincidence? Don’t be ridiculous!)

** This Jesse Watters video literally made me laugh out loud. As an added bonus, here’s a really funny video I found in the comments: https://twitter.com/i/status/1723037915561746564

*** I hope this isn’t one of those “pot-calling-the-kettle-black” things!

**** This dude isn’t alone, either. Here’s a link to the commercial on the social media platform formerly known (and mostly still known) as Twitter: https://twitter.com/HeGetsUs/status/1756829657859772554https://twitter.com/HeGetsUs/status/1756829657859772554 As much as I normally avoid comment sections, I found the comments on this video kind of horrifyingly funny. Your mileage may vary.

Words: A Tale of Disappointment

All About Me, Arts, Books and Literature, Culture, Politics & Culture

During my brief and unlamented period as a graduate student teaching the basic college composition course, and in my current job as a “Writing Consultant”, one of the most important things that I’ve tried to impress on my students and consultees (not really sure what to call them: clients? victims?) is that WORDS HAVE MEANING!!!! That the order/organization of the words in a sentence conveys meaning, and can either accurately convey the writer’s intentions, or confuse the reader, causing them to misunderstand what’s being said.

I fear that it is a futile endeavor. For a long time, I’ve been dismayed by the quality of writing I see in the public sphere, especially in regard to the news. Rarely does a day go by when I don’t notice some glaring grammatical, or even spelling, error in the news coverage of the day. Which leads me to the following headline from today’s Daily Mail, a British newspaper that also publishes American and Australian versions:

Cops: Georgia homeowner shot dead intruder breaking into his house

I will admit to a bit of confusion: initially, I thought the homeowner was killed, and was sad for a moment, until I read on, and realized that the homeowner is fine, and that he had actually shot a dead intruder for breaking into his house.

Now, as a fan of horror and apocalyptic novels and movies, I have to admit, I was both excited – there’s real-world zombie action! – and worried – there’s real-world zombie action?! Oh shit! Needless to say, I felt the need to learn more. I clicked on the link, and you can imagine my dismay when it almost immediately became obvious that I had been misled.

There are so many ways that this headline could have been worded to accurately convey it’s meaning: “Georgia homeowner shoots intruder dead for breaking into his house”, OR “Georgia homeowner kills intruder”, OR “Intruder killed by Georgial homeowner”, OR “Intruder shot dead by homeowner in Georgia”.

So why did the Daily Mail go with their headline? I don’t know. Maybe it’s a British thing, like adding U’s to words like honour, humour, etc. Maybe they are trying to appeal to a more morbid, gothic readership? Whatever the reason, my disappointment/relief about the apparently-not-impending zombie apocalypse was eclipsed by my disappointment in the sinking standards for public writing.

On the upside, bad writing, whether it be mechanical (grammar, punctuation, etc.), or communicative (actually conveying the intended meaning) would seem to be a unifying factor in an increasingly fractured world. It doesn’t matter whether a publication or writer is conservative, liberal, gay, straight, authoritarian, anti-fascist, or whatever other faction you want to mention, or if they’re a professional writer, semi-pro, or hobbyist blogger like me, or if the publication is reputable, disreputable, or just click-bait nonsense, apparently the idea that WORDS HAVE MEANING!!!! means less and less influence every day.

Of course, there are always exceptions – like myself. I pride myslef on vigorously proofreading every word and sentence I write, before sending them out into the world, lavishing all the care on them that most people apply to their children. I would be mortified if errors were to be found in any of my own deathless prose! Except of course, for those intentional errors I plant occasionally, just to prove to myself that readers are just as careless, and uncaring, about words as most writers are. The fact that no one has ever brought any such error to my attention proves that. But I dirgess.

To go back to my initial point, I have to say, irresponsible writing, like that evidenced in writing like: “Cops: Georgia homeowner shot dead intruder breaking into his house” certainly doesn’t make my job any easier. On the other hand, it does provide a certain amount of job security.

Out of Time, Out of Place, Still Not Giving Up

All About Me, Arts, Books and Literature, Culture, Fiction, Movies

There is so much bad and/or stupid stuff going on in the world, and I frequently find myself really, really wanting to write about it. Then I take a step back and realize there are enough angry voices out there, and that I just really, really, don’t want to be one of them – at least not right now. Instead, I’ve decided to write about something I love: Westerns. Specifically Western movies.

Yes, I know I really need to figure out how to resize these pictures.

I’ve always loved westerns. Some of my earliest memories are of my little brother and I building pillow forts to watch High Chapparall on the TV. The only movies I remember my family ever going to were John Wayne movies (although dad did make an exception for Jeremiah Johnson – a glorious experience for seven-year-old me!). I would guess that Westerns have had a stronger influence on how I see the world than just about anything else.

Like any genre, the greatest westerns are those about much more than just cowboys and indians and gunfights and wagon trains and schoolmarms and whatnot. To be truly great, any movie or book has to be doing more than just telling a story: For example, Silverado is one of my favorite westerns. I never get tired of it, but it’s a fun western, not a great one.

One of the themes of most of the truly capital-G Great Westerns that resonates with me more every year are those about the passing of time and place. Sometimes it’s The Wild Bunch or Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, or The Long Riders going down in hail of gunfire because they couldn’t (or wouldn’t) change with the times. Sometimes it’s The Outlaw Josey Wales or Jeremiah Johnson or Shane trying to make a new beginning, to put the past behind. Sometimes, of course, it’s those burnt-out old cowboys and gunslingers showing they’ve still got some fight left in them, like in Unforgiven, Ride the High Country, and Lonesome Dove.

I think the reason I used to love those stories was that, in addition to being capital G Great movies, I felt a lot of sympathy for those characters – and glad that was never going to happen to me. Now, I love them because I can empathize with those characters – because I feel like it’s happening to me. The world I live in is very unlike the world I grew up in, the world of my salad days. Now, it seems like sometimes I spend as much time looking for the remote or cursing because I’ve-hit-the-wrong-damned-button-and-now the-TV-is-asking-me-questions-and-I-can’t-figure-out-what-I’ve-done-wrong-or-how-to-make it-stop, than I do actually watching a movie or show.

I’m pretty sure that in another 10 years or so, I’m going to need to pay a kid just to hang around, turn the TV on, change the channel, etc. It’s really frightening, how fast technology is changing, and how bad I am at keeping up with it. Most days, I don’t even want to try.

Of course, it’s not just technology. It’s society. It’s always changing, and the one thing that doesn’t change is that the generation shouting “We Shall Overcome” at us old fogies will, before they know it, hear a new generation shouting it at them (a tip o’ the hat to Sir Terry Pratchett for that joke).

I’ll tell you what, if you want to feel out of place, try being a retired veteran who’s always worked with his back and his hands, starting a Creative Writing graduate program at a really, really, liberal college like Miami University! It’ll freak you right out. I know it freaked me right out, and not only was I really, really, trying to belong there, everyone there was really, really, trying to make me feel like I belonged.

I’d never even known that pronouns were an issue, until the first day of the program (which was on zoom, talk about an adjustment!), when the Prof. asked us all to introduce ourselves and give our pronouns. At first, I thought it was some kind of English joke. It was not.

Don’t get me wrong – I have no problem with the whole pronoun thing. I figure you’re entitled to be referred to however you want. My issue isn’t philosophical or political or religion-based, it is entirely a matter of an inability to change, no matter how hard I try. It is embarrassing and frustrating to be unable to refer to a perfectly lovely human being as “they” when, for my entire 50+ years, it’s always just been “he” or “she”*. I would sit there stammering and stumbling and cursing, trying to correct myself to “they”, feeling like a jerk and a linguistic dinosaur the whole time (and this was in my last semester of the program!).

Fortunately they (meaning the individual in question, not everybody in the room) was very understanding, and when I apologized after class, told me not to worry, that they appreciated that someone like me would even try, which was more than they got from their family. Honestly, after that, I didn’t know whether to feel better or worse.

But I digress – back to the Westerns!

This morning, I watched Out of the Wild (on Amazon) which, if not a great movie, was a really good one, about a broken-down, alcoholic cowboy forced to take a job at a dude ranch after no real ranch would hire him. It was a beautiful redemption story, but not sappy or sentimental. It put me in mind of the TV movie The Good Old Boys, based on a novel by the late, great Elmer Kelton, about another cowboy facing the end of the cowboying days.

By the way, you can’t go wrong with Elmer Kelton, but his best, in my opinion, are The Good Old Boys, The Time It Never Rained, and The Day the Cowboys Quit, precisely because they deal with the changing times.

Thinking about The Good Old Boys got me thinking about Monte Walsh (the awesome Lee Marvin version, not the Tom Selleck one). Monte Walsh is another one about an aging cowboy, and honestly, I don’t think anyone can do that role better than Lee Marvin (and I just learned that Jack Schaefer, the guy who wrote the book Shane also wrote Monte Walsh! I just bought it – I’ll let you know how it is).

Anyway, this has all been (for the most part anyway) waaaaaay more fun for me than writing about all the things that are wrong with the world and how I’d fix ’em. Probably more fun for you, too. At the very least, you’ve got some good books and movies to check out! By the way, you don’t have to be a man to enjoy them, especially not The Good Old Boys or Out of the Wild, which are basically love stories that even a strong, manly man like myself can love.

I guess that’s about it, for now anyway.

Thanks for reading!

*Or, to my shame, as “it” whenever there was some question. That was years ago, before I became friends with a trans man, and had to seriously start thinking about this stuff, back when I was a much less decent human being, and less Christian, something I’m trying to rectify. Can’t fix something if you can’t admit it’s broken.

I’m Not Yet Abandoning All Hope – But It’s Getting Closer

All About Me, Culture, Politics, Politics & Culture

The older I get, the less I understand the world or anything in it. I just spent about half an hour on the Facebook and Twitter trying to figure out how many “followers” I have – something that sounds just as stupid as it is. The idea that anyone is following me is, quite frankly, horrifying and – I’m pretty sure – one of the signs of the Apocalypse.

I do take some small comfort in the knowledge that the term “followers” does not actually denote any kind of discipleship, worship, or adoration, but is actually social media-speak for “people who are marginally interested in what I have to say OR are just “following” me in hopes I’ll reciprocate” – which would admittedly be hard to fit on a little “button” (or is it “icon”?) on a screen. I say small comfort because I’m a word guy. I like words. I hope to make a living with them. I also feel pretty strongly that they have meaning – or at least that they used to.

And why was I trying to figure out how many followers I have? Because I’m trying to find an agent or publisher for my book, and many agents/publishers want to know that stuff . In addition to how many followers I have, they want to know how active I am on social media, do I have a website, do I have a blog, etc., and how will all that fit into marketing my book, should they deign to represent/publish it.

Seriously? I thought all that marketing stuff was their job (just another thing I’m clueless about). Here I was, thinking all I had to do was spend a couple years’ worth of blood, sweat, and tears researching, writing, re-writing, workshopping, and editing my book, not to mention all the actual money I spent on research, find someone to represent or publish it, and then it was just sit back, put my feet up and wait for the checks to start flooding in.

I mean sure, I figured I might have to do some promotional stuff, like bookstore readings, interviews, talk shows, maybe walk a few red carpets (kidding. I’m stupid, but not delusional), but not actually come up with some kind of marketing strategy. I’m not anybody’s idea of a salesman. I couldn’t sell ice cubes in hell.

And that’s just on the “somebody PLEASE buy my book” front.

Employment is almost as bad. See, I had a master plan – I’d go to graduate school, get an MFA, and then I could get a job teaching at a college. Hahahahahahahaha. Sadly, there were two things I didn’t know: 1) Unless you’ve got tenure or are at least in a tenure-track position (which at my age is extremely unlikely), it is almost impossible make a living teaching at a college as an adjunct (unless you’re just phoning it it or willing to work yourself to death).

And 2) I kind of suck at teaching. I wasn’t really expecting that. I think I was probably at least adequate (marginally), but I just could not connect with the students. Naturally, I blame them. Okay, not really. At worst, it was a 50/50 split, but I think the bulk of the problem was me. At any rate, I care too much about teaching to be willing to do it badly. At my age, I think I’m too set in my ways, and don’t really have time (or the inclination) to change.

So, I’ve gone back to something I am good at: being a Writing Consultant, or Mentor, or whatever they’re calling it this week, at IU East. It’s a great job, and I’m working with great people, but it’s only part-time. Still, I’m hoping it’ll be enough for us to get by until those bestseller-level checks start pouring in.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining (well not a lot, anyway). I’ve made every decision that got me here, and honestly, I don’t know that I’d change any of them if I could. I’ve met some great people along the way, and done some cool stuff, and learned a lot of lessons (many of which weren’t even painful!). I didn’t go to college to get a job. I went to college to learn, and to grad school to get better at the thing I love, which is writing. In both cases, I feel like I succeeded.

I can’t even say I’m surprised at where I’ve ended up. Given my predilection for stubbornness, hard-headedness, and self-destructiveness, I guess I’m surprised that I’m doing as well as I am. I blame it on my wife, the lovely, talented, and long-suffering Jess. My decision to pursue her relentlessly until I wore her down and convinced her to marry me is probably the only good decision I’ve ever made, or at least the absolute best one. She really is the best.

So anyway, here I am, a wildly overeducated middle-aged man with no practical marketable skills and no real inclination to develop any, hoping to strike gold as a writer. Trust me, I know how stupid it sounds – roughly as stupid as it is – still, a dreamer’s gotta dream, right?

Besides, I figure if the writing doesn’t work out and worse comes to worst, I can always go into politics (taking up prostitution seemed like a more decent and honourable option, but I saw myself in the mirror, so that’s off the table). Looking at the clown show that our congress has turned into, I figure its the one field in which a guy like me, with no discernible talents other than bullshitting, can still really shine.

Please join me now in prayer that it doesn’t come to that (seriously, if I do get my book published, buy a copy. If not for my sake, then for the sake of the country!)

I think this would make a great author photo for the back of my book OR a great political ad. What do you think?

Another Post YOU Shouldn’t Read: Independence Day Edition

Culture, Politics & Culture, Religion

Well, another July 4th has come and gone. I’m sorry to say that in the last few years I’ve looked forward to it less each year. It’s not that I don’t love my country – I do. I just think that we should be doing better. At this point, I’m gonna go out on a limb and reiterate that most of you should just stop reading now. If you don’t, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Part of my antipathy regarding the 4th comes from being the owner of a dog who is terrified by fireworks. If it was only the 4th, I could deal with it, but for the last several years, it seems like the 4th runs from mid-June to about the 10th of July. Ralph is an old dog, and we have to keep him more stoned than Cheech and Chong for about 3 weeks, Ralph doesn’t really enjoy getting out of his head – if dogs were political, Ralph would be a staunch conservative.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good fireworks display, but this yearly explodafest is just ridiculous. I mean, what’s the point? Does your willingness to blow shit up for an extended period of time somehow make you more patriotic than me? Or is it just another instance of our national conviction that more is always better (an attitude I also struggle with, particularly in regard to books and food)?

It seems to me that all this patriotism has gotten out of hand – or rather that actual patriotism is something we pay lip service to rather than actually living it. We’re big on displaying the flag. I had an old military friend who lives in Seattle tell me how he really liked how here in Indiana there are so many homes and businesses with American flags flying – apparently there’s not a lot of that where he lives.

In fact, there’s a nice big American flag, complete with solar-powered light so the flag can be seen even at night, at the end of my driveway -my driveway is on an easement, and the landowner is an old Marine. The thing is, I just don’t get it. I’ve lived overseas, and traveled quite a bit, and I don’t remember seeing anything like this flag obsession anywhere else. Everyone else in the world seems to know where they live without having to be constantly reminded, and I don’t believe that the British, Germans, Italians, Norwegians, Nigerians, Egyptians, South Africans, Mexicans, Canadians, etc. love their countries any less than we do ours. Here, it’s everywhere. On our houses, our cars, our car dealerships, our clothes, our tattoos – and I’m making allowance for military people’s tattoos. That’s a tradition I have no problem with.

I will admit that there are some instances where the flag thing might come in handy. Take, for example, the “Red Dawn” scenario that so many of us seem to be so looking forward to. It would be reassuring to the invaders to have such a glaring confirmation that they’ve invaded the right country. Conversely, if they were planning to invade Canada or Mexico, they’d be far more likely to realize their mistake before too much damage was done. They could just pack their gear back up, mumble “Excuse us, we must have taken a wrong turn,” and proceed peacefully to their intended target.

On the other hand, it seems like it could also work against us. Take all these immigrant “invasions”. It seems possible that, without all the visible confirmation that they have indeed reached the “Land of the Free, Home of the Brave”, they might just keep on going and accidentally “invade” Canada – since the U.S. is apparently so inconsequential that we have to constantly remind ourselves where we are. Just a thought.

Something else that troubles me is that so many of us can’t even manage to be consistent in our blatant patriomania. It’s not at all unusual to see people proudly displaying the American flag right alongside the flag of the greatest threat to our nation we’ve ever seen (for those of you who haven’t been keeping score, it’s the battle flag of the Confederacy). That one blows my mind, especially here in Indiana, given our state’s proud contributions to preserving the Union (of course, Indiana was also pretty much ground zero for the resurgence of the Ku Klux Klan back in the early 20th Century – that may be where the confusion comes in). Still, it seems odd that even people stupid enough to revere both flags can’t see the incongruity of it.

On a side note, in case there are any of those semi-neo-Confederates still reading who are bringing up the “heritage” argument, and insisting that destroying statues is tantamount to destroying our history, I would ask them why is your “heritage” more important than the heritage of those whose ancestors suffered so horribly under yours? Why should they “get over it” when you refuse to?

Anyway, back to the flag thing: Another thing that really bothers me is how the flag assumes prominence in places where, to me, it shouldn’t – like in church. It is my feeling that if you’re a Christian, that should take precedence over everything else, ie., love and worship of God takes precedence over love and worship of country. If that is true, then why is the American flag given the place of honor? Here’s a link to the VA’s guidance on flag display. Here are the rules, according to the American Flagpole and Flag Company, which are quite a bit more detailed: see Rule 6. It explicitly states, “When displayed from a staff in a church or public auditorium, the flag of the United States of America should hold the position of superior prominence . . .” So much for “have no other Gods before me”.

Frankly, it also creeps me out when we sing hymns that seem to focus more on worship of country than God as well. I don’t expect it to stop, especially in my little country church, which is home to an exceptionally large proportion of veterans (including my wife and I). In fact, I’m probably losing a lot of cool points with any fellow congregants who might’ve ignored my warnings and continued to read this. To them, I would just say that I’m not saying we can’t be both Christians and patriots – just that one needs to take precedence over the other.

I think what troubles me most about the whole flag thing is that it’s just too easy. Nothing important is ever easy. It seems to me that if all we have to do is put up a flag, or slap a sticker on our car, stick a flag pin on our lapels, or buy a t-shirt to show how patriotic we are, then that patriotism is useless, worthless. That sort of patriotism is all about us, not our country. It seems that if we’re actual patriots, then we ought to be actively working to make our nation better, and that’s hard work.

Finally, I just want to say that I don’t think there’s anything particularly wrong with displaying the flag, especially if it’s done properly, but if that’s all you’re doing to make this country better, then why are you even bothering? Just something to think about.

Another Post You Shouldn’t Read: Unless You Already Don’t Like Me.

Culture, Politics & Culture, Religion

Where justice is denied, where poverty is enforced, where ignorance prevails, and where any one class is made to feel that society is an organized conspiracy to oppress, rob and degrade them, neither persons nor property will be safe – Frederick Douglass

I’ve been struggling with whether to write something about the murder of George Floyd (and by extension, all the others like him), the protests, and the riots. Like many of you, I’m outraged by what is going on in our streets.

I don’t like rioting and looting, but I like defenseless people being killed by those who are sworn “to serve and protect” even less. As far as I’m concerned, if you don’t think that systemic racism is an integral part of our judicial, economic, and political systems, then you don’t know our history and are not paying attention.

I feel like to not speak out against those things is to be part of the problem, and I don’t want to be part of the problem. On the other hand, pretty much everything I have to say has been said much more eloquently and capably by smarter people and better writers than I am.

I kind of feel like what the country doesn’t need right now is another 50-something, white, middle-class, Christian male chiming in with his special take on racism (it’s evil and pervasive in this country – sorry, couldn’t help myself).

So, I’m going with my “special take” on something that’s contributing to the problem that hasn’t been covered quite so completely – Christians.

Yup, Christians. We’re a big part of the problem, going back to the days of slavery when far too many of us were cherry-picking the bible to prove to ourselves that owning people was not only right, but OUR right, and what’s more, was good for those we owned. We used it to justify our evil actions to ourselves, and used it to make sure that those we owned stayed docile and manageable. Note that this also includes justifying our ongoing genocide against Native Americans.

Far too many of us are basically still doing the same thing.

I was heartened by the number of Christians who were disgusted and outraged by the murder of George Floyd. I felt like we were getting somewhere maybe. Then the riots started, and suddenly too many of those same people were saying, “What happened to George Floyd was wrong, but all this destruction of property is REALLY wrong,” and then went on to talk about how those people should be protesting the “right” way.

“Those people” have been protesting peacefully for years, decades even, and many of us Christians were outraged and ferociously outspoken about it, especially when we felt those protests disrespected our flag or our country.

We Christians are big on the bible, and we love it when we can slap a verse on something that’s going on today and sit back in our smug self-righteousness, point at “them” and say “See? God warned us about this, and now they’re gonna get it!”

Of course, it always seems to center around the idea that we’re supposed to be a Christian nation and, because of our misguided tolerance, us good Christians have allowed evil foreigners, unions, atheists, and liberals to hijack the country. It all adds up to manufactured outrage about things that just aren’t so. Things like “they” took God out of school – but what about the idea that God is with us wherever we are? Or, and this is another personal favorite, “they” have taken God out of our government – seriously? Take a look back at our history and tell me when God has ever been even remotely considered by our government when making decisions. That’s not to say he’s never been invoked. He has. All the time. Almost always in the most hypocritical, self-serving, manipulative way possible.

Like I said, we seem to think those verses only apply to “them”, but think about this. Up to, and including now, Christianity has been far and away the predominant religion in this country. All this systemic racism has flourished with Christians at the helm. Now, it seems to me that we are reaping what we have sown. We are watching our country tear itself apart while denying our complicity in our nation’s most fundamental sin – racism.

Because we are all complicit. We are all guilty. I’ve never thought of myself as a racist, but I look back now and see that I have repeatedly said things that were unquestionably, indisputably racist (and they weren’t all in the distant past), without even realizing what I was doing. That’s how ingrained our nation racism is. I’ve realized that I’ve been a racist all my life, without even knowing it, and I’m ashamed of myself.

Anyway, as often happens, my mind has gone off on so many tangents while writing this, that I’ve decided to break it up into multiple posts. I’ll try to title each one so that you’ll know from the title whether you should read it or not.

I’m going to close for now with this: Christ never seemed to value property over life. Why do we? It seems like focusing on the riots is like focusing on coughing up blood without bothering to cut out the cancer that is actually killing us.

Stop the Bullshit!: We’re ALL Part of the Problem – Part 1 – Stupid Generalizations

All About Me, Culture, Politics, Politics & Culture

Disclaimer: One of my favorite writers, Joe R. Lansdale has said that to be a good writer, you have to write as if everyone you know is dead. That’s what I’m doing in this piece. I’m not calling anyone out, but I’m not going to tip-toe around either. If you’re offended, that’s fine, just be offended (maybe take a minute to think about why you’re offended). None of this is intended as a personal attack on anyone, but on certain types of behavior that we’re all frequently guilty of. You’ve been warned.

Disclaimer 2: The following contains some bad language. I make no excuses and offer no apologies. If that sort of thing offends you to the point where it takes precedence over what’s being said, then do yourself a favor and stop reading now.

Stupid Generalizations

Yesterday, I started writing a post about how words, and how we string them together have meaning. I’ve abandoned that post, since I’ve come to the conclusion that most people just don’t care, at least not in America.

That last sentence brings me to my first point: when I first wrote it, it said “. . . no one cares . . .”, which is a gross, and inaccurate generalization. Lots of people in America actually do care. The actual issue, the reason I’ve abandoned that post is that it’s pointless. The people who do care would hopefully read it and agree, but those it was aimed at wouldn’t even bother reading it. I’d just be preaching to the choir, and there’s enough of that kind of bullshit going on in this country right now (which is another point I’ll get to later).

But aren’t we all guilty of making those same kind of gross and inaccurate generalizations, even when we know them to be completely untrue. Every day I see videos, and read “news” articles and social media posts, and hear conversations doing this same thing. Keep in mind that I’m not talking about politicians, or the professional talking heads on the news networks, or internet “influencers” (whatever/whoever they are. I just found out that’s actually a thing), nor the websites of extremist propagandists of every stripe. For the most part, I believer those people are at best, extremely biased, and anything they say should be fact-checked, and at worst – well, I would say they’re whores, but as my dad would have said, that would be denigrating whores.

Nope, I’m talking about normal (whatever that is) people. For argument’s sake, lets say people like you and me (except for YOU of course – you know who you are*). People whom I know to be decent, reasonable, intelligent, caring, and basically good human beings. We’re talking liberals, conservatives, Christians, agnostics, atheists, and undeclared, gay, straight, trans, etc., about as broad slice of the human spectrum as you’re likely to get in rural Indiana.

People who, for all their sterling qualities frequently use the phrase “all conservatives”, “all liberals”, “all Republicans”, “all Democrats”, “all Christians”, “all Muslims”, “all fill-in-your-own-favorite-existential-threat-to-our-country/religion/way of life/etc. demographic”. You know; dipshits. The kind of people who if you were to claim something derogatory about their group would protest vehemently that you can’t attribute the worst whatever of the most extreme branch of whatever group they belong to, to every – or even most – of that group.

Lets face it: anyone who knows anything about people knows that generalizations are pretty much useless and provably false (although is that a generalization in itself?). But we insist on doing it anyway, shrilly and belligerently and as loudly as they can.

I know they’re not going to stop, so all I can say is that I’d appreciate it if you could stop doing that crap around me anyway? At least if you have any interest in me actually listening and considering whatever it is you have to say. On the other hand, I do have to say that it does save me a fair amount of time, since I’ve found that pretty much anything that starts with or includes “all conservatives/liberals/Christians/Muslims/etc. . . .” is basically bullshit anyway, so there’s no sense bothering to read it.

I know a lot of Conservatives/Republicans. Most of my “friends” on the Facebook, and in real life are Conservatives/Republicans. None of them wants to cage children, watch you die because you don’t have health insurance, want to send our troops to more endless wars, or block any legal voter from the polls. Are there some Conservatives/Republicans who either do want to do those things or at least are okay with it? Yes there are, but I don’t know any. The ones I know would give pretty much anyone in need the shirt off their back. At least that’s what I believe they’d do, and I like believing in people.

I also know a lot of Liberals/Democrats. None of the ones I know want open borders, or Soviet-style socialism, or to even get rid of capitalism, to force preachers to gay-marry people, or to destroy the country. Are there some that do want those things? Absolutely there are (although I’m not really sure about that “destroy the country” thing. Not sure what anyone stands to gain from that), but I don’t know any. The ones I know are just as decent and caring , and just as supportive of our country and rights as the conservatives I know.

I would go so far as to say that virtually all of the conservatives I know have way more in common with the vast majority of liberals I know, and vice versa. In fact, I believe that they have more in common with each other than either have with the extreme wing of their own group.

That’s why those bullshit generalizations just make things worse: They’re divisive, hateful, and destructive. That’s the sort of thing that no one who spends any time thinking about the people they know would say.

“All . . .” is the sort of phrase that tells the audience more about the speaker/writer than it does about whoever it is they’re talking about. Before you do it again, think about what it tells people about you.

*Just a joke. Not intended toward any actual person. Still, I have to say I’m curious to see if/how many people take it personally.

Shelley Gorin’s Review of Thumperica!: Eat It, Kirkus!

Arts, Books and Literature, Culture, Fiction, Politics, Politics & Culture, Religion

Since I’ve already posted the Kirkus review of my novel, Thumperica! A Novel of the Ghost of America Future, I feel that, in the interest of presenting a fair and balanced view, I have a responsibility to post the following review from Shelley Gorin, a woman of undeniable taste and depth. Enjoy!

Thumperica!: A review by Shelley Gorin.

The definitive evidence for me of a book being worth reading, or at least being something I’m connecting with on some level, is that overly-cliche’d “inability to put it down.” No matter how “quiet” I try to get in order to have time to read, my life ends up full of nearly-nonstop interruptions. If I’m not really into a book, those interruptions will have me justifying putting it down constantly, and then having an excusably-hard time getting back into it. If I’m really drawn in, however, I’m shushing the interruptions and sacrificing sleep to get it finished. 

Thumperica was both of those for me, at different times. That’s just the normal consequence, I think, of a major hurdle that naturally has to be overcome when setting the stage for the events of a story that’s just enough outside our humdrum daily life and circle of awareness to require some deeper explanation. America TM’s state at the opening of the book seems almost completely unbelievable without such further explanation… almost.

Due to the nature of having to lay a LOT of groundwork and presenting a rather fantastic world (that most of us would not like to admit openly – or even privately – could actually come true), there was a lot of detail and explanation that came along with the core story, especially at the outset. At the start, copious amounts of footnotes seemed almost distracting. They ended up, however, being one of the book’s strengths, and something I clung onto to help me navigate the difficult groundwork.

The first handful of chapters were admittedly hard for me to stick with – they hit me like Tolkien’s Silmarillion, that was so detailed and so outside my brain’s normal ability to retain an overload of information outside its little bubble, that I had to keep re-reading pages and chapters it to try to get it to stick. There was a LOT of detail in Thumperica’s first chapters that left me going, “Wait, what? I can’t remember what that was. Who was that again?”… and a LOT acronyms. I couldn’t read it, originally, any time my anxiety was flared up, because my brain just got overloaded with info and stopped taking it in. 

However, instead of leaving it and not coming back, I kept going back to pick it up and push through. Part of that was a promise – I said I was gonna read it! Most of what initially hooked me, though, was the hidden humor and the play on names… I’d be reading along, trying to keep up, and suddenly do a spit-take. There were also a few times I thought, “Oh man, Lloyd’s not right in the head,” and smiled. But mostly I stuck it out because there was just enough “could be true” woven in, that I wanted to see just how this whole mess of a nation might turn out.

In all frankness, Thumperica is a WEIRD book. It is clearly written by someone who has little interest in following status-quo success recipes for best sellers. It’s probably not going to make the New York Times best seller list (though who knows?), but it’s a worthwhile read. I want to say it was about a quarter of the way through that I found I was staying up late to finish chapters, or I was shushing interruptions. It happened subtly. But sticking it out through the initial info overload was worth it, once the chess pieces started to move.

There were many moments where I felt the plot was over the top – a country couldn’t POSSIBLY become THAT effed up. And yet, if Scripture tells us that things like adultery actually occur in the heart, or that a man is as he thinks in his heart, Thumperica is a frightening exposure of just how dark, depraved, and gluttonous mankind can be, if we are brutally honest with ourselves. And if that fantastic and depraved world is unrealistic, the fantastic and depraved thoughts in our own minds are not. As such, Thumperica is a book that might make you a wee bit uncomfortable, if you’re prone to self-examination. And if our basest human instincts (not simply sexual, as some might assume, but greed, power, control, all-who-aren’t-like-me-are-bad, or mine-is-bigger kind of thinking) are left to run amok; if we become, personally or as a country, increasingly desensitized over generations to things like basic human conscience and dignity, and we re-write the rules or re-spin the sacred to support such things, is it truly that far-fetched?

Is that not exactly what we’ve already done as a nation? We can’t be naive enough to think that we as a people have not been guilty of genocide, degradation, or humiliation of races and peoples on the scale of Hitler, in our past. The kind of world presented in Thumperica is certainly extreme, but it is already in existence; it already HAS been in existence. And it may be in a bit of existence in each of us. 

Further back in mankind’s history, “civilized” humans once killed other humans for entertainment; they certainly have killed for lust or power or greed in our generation as much as in the first. If someone held a magnifying glass to our basest thoughts or perhaps gave them free reign, it’s frighteningly possible that things could decline to the state in which Thumperica begins. They seem too far-fetched and yet too near to what we wish not to see in reality; they could have easily been predicted by Irving’s Owen Meany, and it feels as though they were. There are elements of this book that seem to be a nod that one. And though my first instinct was to laugh and how absurd it all sounded, there is enough in my life experience to say that the comedy of it all reveals a real tragedy underneath.

I am left wondering what my own part might be in the macabre play, if I keep my eyes closed.  I truly did not know where this book was going, or could possibly go; it certainly didn’t go where I thought it would. It didn’t wrap up with a neat little bow, and it didn’t follow predictable patterns of overused plot devices. But that’s the reality of the world in which we live – rarely does anything go as expected, and even knowing that mankind repeats itself endlessly (“nothing new under the sun,”) that knowledge doesn’t help us prevent those twists and turns, or even stop the unfairness of it all.

But sometimes…. sometimes, evil will overreach and be its own undoing. And that is the hope for those seemingly doomed under it all in this book and in life – if we question those things our conscience can’t abide, and we’re willing to risk fighting for it, even when the odds are stacked, maybe evil things will stumble.The book certainly leans strongly left, but even those leaning strongly right can find good substance here, if they’re willing to set aside party and politics enough to let it simply be a magnifying glass on mankind left to its own devices. It wouldn’t matter what party or what political leaning a person claimed, the potential is there for anyone willing to question what blind allegiance to blind national ambition can lead to.

Thumperica is NOT a book I’d recommend my mother read, or a Sunday School class, or anyone easily offended – unless being offended is the very thing they need. There are elements to the book that won’t be fitting for the book club, but they just might be the food for thought we need in the days and years ahead. 

And Now for Something Not Completely Different: A Few Recommendations

All About Me, Arts, Books and Literature, Culture, Movies, Music

Enough with dwelling on politics and all the bad stuff in the world. Also, I don’t want you guys thinking I’ve just turned into an Andy Rooney-type grouchy old dude who just hates everything. I’ve recently read, or watched, or listened to some really good stuff that has actually made me feel better.

Books:

I’ve got to admit, a lot of the books I’ve read lately have not been what you’d call “feel-good” reads – a lot of history books, particularly about the Indian wars. After reading a lot (a LOT) of that stuff (research for a new novel), I needed some lighter fair, so I read The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window And Disappeared, by Jonas Jonasson.

It is a really funny novel that’s sort of a mix between a caper novel and Forrest Gump (if Gump were Swedish, 100 years old, and a demolitions expert). It’s just a really fun novel to read, and surprisingly reassuring.

It’s also a very nice novel: little to no cursing, no sex, virtually no violence (lots of explosions, however), honestly, I can’t think of really anything objectionable about it. It is literally suitable for everyone. Seems a little weird to be recommending something like that. Anyway, it gets my highest recommendation. If you need a good laugh and some relief from the daily horrorshow of social media and 24-hour news, this is the book for you.

Next up, The Android’s Dream, by John Scalzi. I’m no huge fan of science fiction, but Scalzi is a really funny writer. I loved his novel RedShirts, which not only made me laugh, but made me think.

The Android’s Dream is about a guy who has to save humanity from interstellar war by saving a woman who – as a result of genetic experimentation and mad-sciencetry- has no idea that her DNA contains a specific kind of sheep DNA.

It’s pretty weird, and very funny, with lots of bad guys, some violence and bad language (nothing really gratuitous or extreme), a little romance, some interstellar political intrigue, and at least one extremely unusual and funny way of assassination. Highly recommended, especially for sci-fi fans.

Movies

We Have Always Lived In the Castle. Based on a novel by Shirley Jackson (The Haunting of Hill House, “The Lottery”). A really creepy story about two wealthy sisters living in the house where their parents were poisoned. Although the older sister was tried and acquitted of the murders, the girls are hated in the village. Things go from bad to worse when a cousin comes to visit.

Little to no sex, nudity, bad language. Some mob violence (old-fashioned pitchforks and torches type, not Godfather). Not particularly scary, but very unsettling, in a good way. Available on Netflix.

The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared. Okay, yes, it’s just the film version of the book, but for those who don’t have time to read, it’s a really faithful version, and maintains the spirit of the book. In Swedish with English subtitles.

Ready or Not. A poor girl marries into a wealthy board game family. Whenever someone marries into the family, they must draw a card from a magic box and play the game indicated. There’s only one bad card, and this poor girl draws it. A really funny horror-comedy, and lots of fun to watch. One of the few movies I’ve seen in the theater that I didn’t regret going to see.

Lots of gratuitous almost everything: violence, bad language, bad behaviour, violence, bloodshed, violence, and a huge splatter factor. Oddly enough, no nudity, but plenty of everything else.

Should be coming out on video and streaming soon.

TV

Marianne. French tv show about a horror novel writer who is being tormented by a 16th century witch who wants her to keep writing. Not a great show – it’s French, dubbed into English, so the dialogue doesn’t always carry the emotional impact the scenes deserve – but it is very creepy, with some decent surprises.

Quite a bit of nudity, bad language, bloodshed, and violence. Available on Netflix.

Good Omens. Based on the novel by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, it’s all about the endtimes. Really funny stuff, with a great cast, and a lot of heart. It shares quite a few plot points with The Omen and Rosemary’s Baby, but it’s much funnier than either of those.

I don’t really remember much in the way of violence, profanity, or nudity/sex, but then again, I’m probably pretty jaded. The whole thing is probably pretty objectionable for the more fundamentalists out there, but I think it asks a lot of questions that we ought to be asking.

Norsemen. Sort of a cross between Vikings and The Office. Really funny. Can’t really remember anything too objectionable, but then again, I’m pretty jaded.

Music

YYNOT. Kind of a strange band, at least for an old-timer like me. They started out as a kind of internet-based Rush cover band, but have coalesced into an actual band. They do awesome covers of Rush songs, and have now released two albums of original (heavily Rush-influenced) material. Both albums are really good. If you’re a fan of Rush, chances are you’ll like YYNOT. If you’re not a fan of Rush, you should give them a try anyway.

Bob Mould. If you like hard-edged, punk-tinged, pounding-but-melodic music, then check out Bob Mould. Whether as a solo act or part of the bands Husker Du and Sugar, he won’t let you down. Husker Du has been cited as very influential on the alt-rock scene of the 90’s. I highly recommend the Husker Du album Warehouse: Songs and Stories, the Sugar album Copper Blue, and his solo albums Patch the Sky and Silver Age.

The Wood Brothers. A great jazz/blues/folk band, similar to the Avett Brothers, but honestly, their songs are (to me anyway) much more memorable. Some really great stuff. I recommend the albums The Muse and Ways Not To Lose. If you like those, then go crazy.

Finally, the strangest of the bunch, Cynthia Hopkins. I think she’s really more of a performance artist than just a musician, but she makes some really great, weird, challenging music. I don’t really think she’s an acquired taste, I think she’s one of those that you either like or don’t like, at the first listen. At any rate, I really like her, and recommend the album The Truth: A Tragedy.

Anyway, I guess that oughta be enough for now. Remember, no matter how much bad crap gets flung at us, there’s a lot of good stuff out there too. Enjoy!